The Art of Sleeping

I think Carly Simon was thinking about me when she sang the words, “Nobody Does It Better.”

You see, I have elevated sleeping to an art form.

I can sleep anywhere, anytime.

The lawn guys are outside and their mowers and making a racket.

Look at me. I’m asleep.

It’s not that I need my beauty sleep.

I know I’m already beautiful.

But it takes a lot of energy to keep up with you.

During the day you go through a lot of emotions and I’m there to be your support and your friend.

I love you.

And it takes a lot of energy to be there for you.

Sure, sometimes I leave you a little present down the hall. I forgive you for not taking me out on time. I should have trained you better.

I just want you to know that when I’m sleeping, I’m doing it for you.

It’s my sacrifice for the good of the both of us.

You see, I could be running around all the time without a care in the world but I decide to devote a large part of my day for sleeping.

It’s not for me.

It’s really for you.

Really?

You don’t believe me?

Alright, I’m headed to bed.

It’s exhausting coming up with something for you every day.

Listen, when I wake up I want to see a lot of clicks on the like button.

Go ahead. Make my day.