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RALPH Speaks

Give Me The Paw

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I don’t understand humans.

I mean like at ALL.

After I was with my dog parent a few weeks.

I needed to train him.

I trained him to give me treats when I sat.

Then he gave me more treats when I lay down.


No one ever told me dogs get treats for laying down.

Then he gave me treats for peeing outside.


What a great world this is when you get treats for peeing.

Like who would ever believe it!

There were treats for pooping too.

I mean – is life great or what!

But then, things got really tough.

I had to train my owner to give me a treat for letting him hold my paw!

Optimized Dogshakepaw
Give Me The Paw

He’s kind of slow but I’ve got him right where I want him.

Sometimes, I don’t respond right away so he keeps giving me treats.

‘Cause I learned a while ago, if you learn something too quickly, they stop rewarding you.

So my advice to dogs everywhere is…

Keep your dog parents on a tight leash.

And make sure they give you lots of treats.

Now remember, if you like my ramblings, you can always give me treats.

But since you don’t live with me, please click the LIKE button.

It’s just like giving me a treat – but without the calories.

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