RALPH Speaks

Why Does He Think I Pooped In the Hall?

My dog parent is psychic.

He came up to me yesterday morning and asked, “Ralph, who pooped in the hall?”

Did he really expect me to know – out of all the people who live in our town – who’s dog broke in to our house and pooped in the hall?

I mean, really – how am I supposed to know that.

I think he suspects it was me.

Now don’t you think that’s a bit unfair.

Okay, bottom line.  It WAS me.

But how could he know?

He wasn’t there.

It kinda came out pretty quickly.

There was this spot and it needed to be pooped on.  So I did it.

But the truth is.

It could have been someone else.

Now I have no suggestions.

I just don’t think it’s fair that my dog parent assumes it’s me.

Do you think it’s discrimination?

Should I hire one of those big time lawyers and sue him?

Or do you think he would reciprocate by cutting off my dog treats.

These are the things that keep a dog up at night.

In case you wanted to know.


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