RALPH Speaks

Why I’m Running For Congress

The dog house has been incredibly active lately since I’ve declared by run for Congress.

It’s gotten some people to smile and others to start yelling.

People say, “You can’t run for Congress!”

But I point out to them there is no place in the US Constitution that says a dog can not run for Congress.

Now if you look at any of the polls, no one – except the Congressmen themselves – believe they are doing a good job.

They’re busy looking out after their own interests to care about us little folks.

And that’s where I come in.

I’m not big but I can bark.

And because I’m a puppy, I love everyone.

Can you name a Congressman who loves everyone?

I mean aside from Anthony Wiener…

Can you just imagine it – a puppy in Congress.

And you know us mutts.

We breed.

Today Congress – tomorrow – the Supreme Court.

We are going to have to do something about those robes!

Okay all that campaigning is making me tired.

Can you scratch behind the ears?

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